When White Was Black

This is a poem I wrote while in the darker part of my recovery but I don't ever want to forget the emotions of the dark winter of 2011:

When White Was Black-by Allison A. Jessop

White used to be white...

White, fluffy, inviting

Daring, fun, beautiful!

Only to turn dark...

A step, a slip, a crack

Laying helplessly in the white,

Feeling black.

Crawling indoors for

Warmth? Comfort?

None comes....

White caused shivering...

And much crying.

White caused Black.

White falls all around...

Every day

Every night

As I sit inside my prison

Surrounded by white!

Only the chair and a book

Allows black to turn white.

Falling white I can't shovel.

As it piles, I become blacker.

Wishing white had never

Become black...

But it has.

So much white, I can't see!

So much black, I can't breathe!

Could I please just have gray?

White used to be white...

White, fluffy, inviting

Daring, fun, beautiful!